


Is this your evolution?

by MisanthropistDude



Category: Splatoon
Genre: Depressing, F/M, Only at the beggining, Romance, Somewhat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-06
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-11-12 18:31:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18016130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MisanthropistDude/pseuds/MisanthropistDude
Summary: A human, Albert Olavarriet, a human living in a psudoapocalipse, something bad happened, he survived, how? Not important. Cryoshit o something like that. He gets to meet the lovely inklings, how will he react, an misanthopist piece of crap with major in science? Discover soon.





	1. I suppose that this is somehow bad for me.

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, not my best summary yet, but I guess it should work for now. Just as a warning, a lot of swearing will be spelled here, so, if you don't like that, then get out, only real crap enters here haha.
> 
> When somebody talk it will be marked with '...'. Excluding the beggining, the POV will be in third person, but the thoughts of out protagonist will be between parenthesis (...).

Year- 2019    Month- 03   Day- Who the fuck cares!?

Entry#43

-Guess this is the end of the human race, not too much but if a superior being listen to this, I want to know that... fuck you!!

-But no, we really lost the track of time, not that important if you are underwater, it’s not like we can go out and take some sun.

EndEntry

-

Year- 2019    Month- 12    Day- 24

Entry#44

-Today is Christmas eve, somehow, we manage to get this right because of my now death cellphone reminding us, we have no official calendar nor a clock that is correct, so, not  gonna  count the time from now on.

EntryEnd

-

Entry#end ?”wd

Year- 2020    Month- ??    Day \- ??

-We’ll start the cryostasis, not sure why. I tried to convince them that the world would be much better without us, but sure... why not? We already destroyed the world once, let’s go for seconds,  hahaha  I hate humanity so much.

-Let’s go to sleep dudes.

Starting cryostasis state. Duration: 2000 years approx.. Working  cryopods : 15

EndEntry

-

Ertyn$1111111112’’¿$%&

Year- 1XXXX    Month- XX   Day- XX

-….........................................................................................................................

Ending cryostasis state. Duration: +10000 years-$%#  errorrrrrr

Working  cryopods : %#$%#1# &”& %$°

EtdrynEn

\---end---

(What?... Did the cryostasis end?... Why can’t I get out?....... Fuck...).

Cryopods  began to open while a voice says ‘Error... more than enough time has passed,  cryopod  malfunction, begin emergency override’.

(Great, I can get out of this bullshit) Albert though as he got up, feeling sore and pretty bad. (I guess this is what happens when you sleep for this much time).

‘Is somebody there?’ Albert shouted to check if he could contact with his companions.

No sound apart from the eco caused by his voice was heard. (Looks like this really had some problems, if it’s really like that, then I suppose that am lucky for being alive, or maybe unlucky).

Albert began to walk around to check the pods, only to see  flat  vitals in every single one of them. (I didn’t hate them, but we kind of deserve extinction. I guess if am alive, I should see what’s up with the surface.... Now, how the fuck do I get out of here).

\-----

(Ok, somehow, I got to the escape pods, they’ll swim for the nearest surface on earth, so I’ll get to some random ass beach... I hate the beach, fuck).

Albert started to type in a weird looking keyboard. (Good, I need a fucking programmer and the only one I know is death, this will take a while).

\-----

Albert typed for at least 3 hours until if finally began to work and a voice talked and said the environmental conditions on the surface. ‘Levels of oxygen at 21%, nitrogen  at 7 8% approx. Carbon-based creatures found on the nearest beach, apparently human-shaped'. (What? Humanoid creatures? Sounds like gold, I'll see if they I can get in contact with them). ‘They appear to speak an unknown language’. ( Of course  they would! There is no point of them speaking human languages, we are extinct after all).

Albert spoke this time. ‘These creatures, do you think that you can show me an image?’

To which the machine answered. ‘Negative, the camera of the sensor stopped working around 5000 years ago’. 

Albert panicked. ‘5000 years ago!? Wait! Just how much time did the  cryopods  kept us asleep!?’

‘Around 12643 years, 7 months and 57  days’ . (That’s way more that we were planning. No wonder another dominant species arose, still 13000 years of evolution are little compared to the rest of studied cases).

‘Machine, can you study the language of those creatures?’ (I’d like to state my peaceful intentions from the very beginning).

‘It will take a while, but I can do that’. (Great).

Albert got up and stretched while saying. ‘Do you have a name? And where is the food?’

‘You can call me Jack’. A little robot came out of a trapdoor in the floor, which spoke a little after. ‘Follow me sir’.

Albert putted his hands behind his head while taking long steps. ‘Right behind you, boss’.


	2. Not really my place

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things get a little more interesting.

‘This tastes like shit’. Albert had a very disgusted face while he tried to eat the shitlike food that Jack had served him. 

‘A pretty normal occurrence when you have 12000 years-old food in the storage’. Jack smugly replied. (Who programmed that stupid flying piece of scrap?) 

‘I sure did think of that, robot. Thanks for the insight’. (Tremendous piece of shit that I'm trapped with). 

‘It’s my job, no need to be grateful’. Jack replied with a sarcastic yet monotonous voice. (Only because you’re still use full, perhaps after getting out if this shithole I can scrape you). 

Albert got up and started walking towards the cryopod chamber. ‘I will return shortly, please, do not follow me’. Albert had a melancholic tone in his voice. 

‘I understand, I will wait for you here sir’. Jack replied while lowering the height of its hover till it touched the floor. 

\----- -------------

Albert walked through the chamber and looked to his now deceased companions. (We weren’t that close, but I still respect every single one of you, you sticked to your guts without flinching even once, that’s admirable). 

‘...’ Albert stood there for what seemed hours, and after a while he decided to go and look for a place to sleep. ‘I would be way easier if you were here’. (Goodbye, I hope you rest well). 

\----- ------------

Jack started to hover the same second Albert entered the room. ‘Are you all right sir?’ Jack asked seemingly concerned. 

‘Yeah, just tired... that’s all’. (Being the only thing alive in this whole facility is overwhelming). 

‘Shall I lead you to your room sir?’ Jack when on without waiting for an answer. 

‘Please do’. 

Nothing else was said. 

\----- -------------

‘...’ Albert opened his eyes and look around. (Thinking all of this was a dream. Such a childish thought). 

Jack appeared from the floor. ‘Good morning, I have good and bad news’. (Isn’t way too early for trouble?) 

‘Good news first’. Albert answered while getting changed, putting some plain dark pants and a white t-shirt. 

‘The Good news are that I was able to fully understand the dialect of this new creatures.’ (That’s cool?) ‘The bad news are that it seems to be complicated, so you will have to learn it and copy its accent’. (Grand... more studying). 

‘Give me the data so I can learn it’. Albert said careless. 

‘With you level of comprehension, you should be able to learn it if you fully focus on it in around a week or so’. Jack enthusiastically said. (Wish I shared the enthusiasm). 

‘Let’s get to this so a can finish quick’. 

\----- (Time skip- 6 days) ----- 

-Subway- 

An octoling fighting with an inkling. The inkling seems to be controlled by some weird organism that resides in its head, and an older inkling was forced to watch due being tied. 

‘Agent 8! Defeat agent 3, but try not to harm her!’ Shouted the old inkling. 

‘On it, Cap’n Cuttlefish!’ Shouted the female octoling. 

The orange inkling jumped high in the air and dropped with a big explosion that send the red octoling back a couple feet. 

‘Ahhg’. The harmed octoling shouted. She slowly started to get up with a splatboom in hand. ‘Let’s see if this fits your taste’. To which the orange inkling smirked. 

-Meanwhile- 

‘Finally! I learned to talk this weird as fuck language’. (Couldn’t copy the accent thou). Albert got up and stretched. 

‘Congratulations sir’. Said Jack with a voice that actually said ‘I don’t fucking care haha’. 

‘Sure dickhead, let’s head to the surface. I’m kind of curious of how much the world has recover from our handling’. Albert headed towards the scapepod. (Maybe I'm rushing it... meh whatever). 

‘Let me keep you company sir’. (I really got fond with this stupid robot). 

‘Sure, I'll need your help anyway’. Albert started to get the pod on. (This will take a while). 

\--Meanwhile-- 

The battle had long ended with the octoling’s victory. Beside her lied a perfectly sane, but unconscious body of the orange inkling. 

‘Well done agent 8’. Cuttlefish praised the little octoling girl. 

The octoling girl blushed a little. ‘It was nothing special really’. 

‘It was, but we need to get out of here. You go first, I'll be right behind you along with the agent 3’. 

‘Sure thing, Cap’n!’ The octoling girl said while making a salute. 

‘This is not the army little one, relax’. A little smile peaked out of Cuttlefish mouth. 

‘Right... Sorry I did it out of habit, I'll meet you out’. The octoling girl now a little embarrassed. 

‘Go ahead’. 

The elevator started to go up and she got an amazing view of Inkopolis. ‘Whoa, this is amazing’. She then saw Pearl, a short inkling with white ink, and Marina, a taller octoling with black ink, coming in a helicopter while waving at her. 

It didn’t take more than 10 minutes to get Cuttlefish and agent 3 on the surface and boarding the plane, agent 3 still unconscious. 

Everything was good, until a statue started to emerge from the platform that they were on some time ago. 

\---Meanwhile--- 

‘Great, now we can go to the surface. Just a couple questions, if you don’t mind’. Albert said before pushing the big red emerge button. 

‘What do you want, highness’. Jack said with clear annoyance in its robotic and clearly devoid of emotion voice. (What the fuck is wrong with this robot? Sometimes it’s all good and treats me like a friend, then sometimes I'm not even worth of being compostable, almost like some kind of personality disorder or some shit). 

‘I’d like to know, why this pod, that seems to be more like a cruise, has mass destruction weapons’. Albert asked with a hint of hatred towards whoever designed this. (We were supposed to recreate a new Eden, weapons are unnecessary). 

‘Just in the case of defensive needs’. Jack simply answered. 

‘Oh yeah, sounds about right’. Sarcasm leaked out of every word. 

‘No, it’s actually no alri-’ ‘I fucking know that you piece of trash!’ Albert interrupted Jack before it said something really stupid. 

‘You know what? Just activate the stupid cruise’. Albert dismissed. 

‘What’s the magic word?’ Jack pretentiously asked. 

‘I’ll fucking do it myself you useless flying dildo’. Albert pushed the button and everything began to tremble. 

\----Meanwhile---- 

Everyone at the helicopter were in awe as a statue with a human figure emerged. 

‘That form... But they were said to have been destroyed so long ago. It’s... a human!’ Cuttlefish told everyone as the figure continued to emerge. 

Just a couple seconds after that another structure rised from the sea, looking like a giant ship with a huge glass capsule. 

The capsule broke and from the top deck a human figure could be seen along with a robot that hovered around it. 

‘A helicopter and a human statue? What’s going on?’ Albert asked to himself. (What the actual fuck). 

The inklings and octolings that were on the helicopter began to panic. ‘Humans were supposed to be extinct!’ Said Marina while looking in complete disbelief. (They actually have a word for human in their vocabulary, that’s curious). 

Then a voice was heard from the statue. ‘TARTAR IS HERE!’ A weird telephone looking thing spoke. (What’s that weird goo that is coming out of it?) 

‘You again, dammed telephone’. Cuttlefish talked again. (What the fuck is that thing, and the other shits have tentacles on their head? Tha-) 

Albert thoughts were interrupted by a weird sound, now known as Tartar. ‘I Tartar, an AI built by a great professor 12000 years ago’. (Think I know who was that). 

‘Hey, Tartar!’ Albert shouted from the deck. 

To which Tartar looked at the human below it. ‘Impossible, humans where supposed to be extinct’. Tartar questioned. 

‘They aren’t, know... What the fuck did the idiot of Mike programmed you for?’ Albert got closer to the statue. 

‘I’m supposed to pass the knowledge to the next generation of intelligent habitants, but these creatures are deemed unworthy and must be eliminated’. Tartar said as a matter of fact. (More annihilation? Great). 

‘Stop that right now, I’m sure they can become worthy’. Albert tried to reason with the telephone. 

Tartar just ignored Albert and started to charge a laser pointing at Inkopolis. 

‘Are you going to ignore me?’ Albert asked. 

‘...’ Tartar kept charging the laser. (You piece of shit, think you’re better than me?) 

‘Jack’. 

‘Yes sir?’ Jack asked. 

‘Prepare to nuke that stupid telephone crap’. Albert mildly infuriated said. (Let’s see if you like missiles up your ass). 

‘Sir, we don’t have nukes in this ship’. Jack replied. 

‘Just prepare and launch the missiles to destroy that stupid statue’. Albert was still angry. 

‘Right away sir’. The top of some missiles came to view as Jack said that. ‘How many do you need?’ 

‘Enough to decimate that entire statue’. 

‘Preparing launching sequence’. Could be heard all over the deck. 

Then a lot of missiles came out of the cruise and started to destroy the statue.

'Wait, what are you doing!?' Tartar shouted before a missile went directly a it and destroy it, then started to decimate the whole statue.

‘Hahahaha take that you piece of shit!’ Albert celebrated with Jack. 

While that happened the inklings and the octolings whare in total awe, impressed but terrorized. ‘So that’s the power of the humans’. Said the agent 3 while getting up. 

‘Agent 3! You are finally awake!’ Cuttlefish celebrated. 

‘Of course, that noise would wake anyone’. The agent 3 seemed a little irritated. 

‘We should go and thank the human down there’. Agent 8 suggested. 

‘No way, humans are scary’. Marina instantly said. 

‘But he help us getting rid of Tartar’. Agent 8 said while agent 3 and Cuttlefish agreed. 

‘They have a point Marina’. Pearl tried to convince her friend. 

‘... ok... but I'm staying behind you, ok?’ Marina warned. 

‘Sure princess’. Pearl said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Way bigger than it should, but I had time.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I could not really find something that told me the real height of inklings and octolings, so since I have a stature complex I will make them around 4'7'' (1.4m) and the squid sisters which seems to be older and taller will be 5' (1.5m) also Marina seems taller. Pearl will be shorter with around 4'3'' (1.3m). The other species that are taller than the inklings will be around the same height than Albert (1.65m).  
> I know those aren't the real statures but who cares.

Albert saw the creatures with an unidentified name heading towards him. 

‘Do you think they have hostile intentions? I mean, we looked kinda menacing but we helped them, right?’ Albert panicked as if he just caused an interspecies war. (I did not just fuck up... I did not just fuck up...) 

‘I highly doubt that sir. Then don’t look prepared to attack or anything like that’. Jack reassured Albert. 

‘Yeah... you’re right’. (I hope you are, I would like not to have to exterminate life once again). Albert weighted his options. 

While they discussed the creatures approached and were just a few feet away. 

‘Here they come, that lessons that you took to learn their language will come handy now sir’. Jack voiced while he hovered a little higher than Albert’s head. 

When the creatures got close enough, Albert decided to take the initiative and talked first. (They really look weird from up close, they are hot though... wait! Does this count as being a furry? I mean, they are technically cephalopods... meh, whatever. Still, the black one and the red one look slightly different from the orange one and the white one. Are they different species of some sort? I’ll ask them directly). 

‘Salutations, my name is Albert, and I am a human. It’s a pleasure to make contact with you’. Albert struggled a little, you know, being the first time actually taking the weird language. (I hope my accent doesn’t make me sound weird). 

‘Oh, so you already know our language, this will be easier then’. The short white one said while taking a step closer and stretched her hand towards Albert, to which he reciprocated this gesture. (They are pleasing to interact with). 

‘Wow, you’re really tall’. The red one said while approaching a little too close. (First time hearing that, and felt quite pleasant). 

‘I’m not, for a human I'm pretty short. Never mind that, you know that I am a human but I don’t know what are you. Some kind of anthropomorphic cephalopod?’ Albert asked genuinely intrigued. (Wait, I used some human terms there). 

‘Cefahlopud? Antroupourmorf-ik?’ The red one questioned as she tilted her head slightly. (What? That’s so fucking cute). 

‘Those are human terms for humanoid squids or octopi’. Albert explained simply. 

‘If that’s what you mean, then yes, we are. Our species are called Inklings and these girls are Octolings’. This time was the older one, he pointed the black one and the red one. (Knew they were different species). ‘It’s a pleasure to meet a legendary human. My name is Cap’n Cuttlefish’. (Cap’n is part of his name?) 

‘Likewise, my name is Albert’. Albert said while they shook their hands. (This guy’s not bad). 

‘Oh yes, sorry, where did I left my manners? My name is Pearl’. Said the short Inkling with white tentacles. (The sassy but cute one). 

‘Mine is Octavia, also known as agent 8’. Said the Octoling with red tentacles with a big smile. (The cute one). 

‘I’m Orange... (such a name), also known as agent 3’. The orange Inkling that was called Orange said. (She’s cute too, her name is bad though). 

‘My name is... Marina’. The tall Octoling with black tentacles. (She’s hot). 

‘It’s a pleasure to meet you all’. Albert said mustering a little smile. 

‘Wow, it’s weird. In the books is said that humans had little intelligence and were primitive, but you look kinda intellectual and this thing is not primitive at all’. Octavia voiced some really mean thoughts while pointing at Jack. (They picture us like that, not entirely wrong, but we seem to be more intelligent than them). 

‘Indeed, I’m not primitive. By the way sir, I’ll return to the insides of the E.D.E.N. to recharge’. Jack said as he disappeared. 

‘E.D.E.N.? What’s that?’. Asked Cuttlefish. 

‘It’s the name of this ship that we are standing on, it means Extinction Delayer of the Entire Nation, but only a really small group of people manage to enter, and everyone but me died in the process. So, you are seeing the last human alive’. Albert said in a sad way. (Sadly, it’s better for everyone this way). 

‘I understand you... I mean... I know what is like to lose your family’. This time was Marina talking. 

Albert look her in a comforting way. ‘We deserved everything that happened to us, so it’s not all that bad’. 

‘You deserved that? Explain please’. Orange was the one to ask. (I knew this was coming, but if they hate me for this, I can’t do anything about it). 

‘We humans, were a pretty destructive species, we killed and destroyed anything in our path, even our own fellow humans. That lead to pointless wars which ended in genocides, and our development cause a lot of damage to the environment. We were the cause of the rising sea levels. In the bright side, we discovered a lot of things, from things so small like molecular interactions to events that happen in the outer space. Tartar was the one to judge if you were deemed worthy of possessing this knowledge, but I’m going to take that job from him, it’s not that I think your species are not worth, it’s the power behind this knowledge that can lead to a megalomaniac state. Just so human history isn’t written again’. Albert said while looking. (They could become even better than any of us could have ever wished). 

‘That’s... a lot to take.’ Cuttlefish said while taking a step forward. 

‘I know, but it’s my responsibility as the last human alive to pass our knowledge to the next generations of life’. Albert couldn’t help but to look melancholic. 

‘Let’s forget about that for a while. We never got to actually thank you for helping us back there. So, would you like to come to the city and eat with us?’ Octavia said enthusiastically as she pulled Albert’s hand. (It’s our fault that Tartar was attacking you... but I can’t say that, they’ll get more depressed). 

‘Sure, I’ve been eating 12000-year-old food, that would be a pleasant change of pace’. Albert looked forward eating some real food... (Wait, what’s the diet of the Inkling and Octolings?) ‘Only a question though, are omnivore? Or what’s your kind of diet?’ 

‘We eat pretty much everything, from seaweed and some terrestrial fruits and vegetables to meat from land and sea’. Cuttlefish was the one to answer. (That’s good to hear). 

‘That’s great, humans had a similar diet’. Albert really looked excited for eating something other than expired food bags. 

‘It’s good to hear that. So, what are we waiting? Let’s go!’ Said a very excited Pearl. Meanwhile, Albert was looking towards the sea water. (I want to swim, just a little bit. Seems like the perfect temperature and looks like it’s clean). 

‘Wait, I'll just going to swim a little bit’. Albert took of his pants and shirt and ran towards the edge of the ship. 

‘What? Nooo! What are you doing?! You’ll die!’ Said a really panicked Marina. (Die? From sea water?) Albert ignored the warnings and jumped. 

Albert splashed a lot of water and swam deep so he could see the sea life a little bit. (I can’t see shit). Or maybe not. Meanwhile, everyone was really scared of what could have happened to Albert, looking to the sea terrified that the only human alive had suicided. 

‘*Gasp* That was refreshing. You should join too, a bit of sea water never killed anyone’. Albert said while floating a little. (Unless you are a retard that is). 

‘What? You can stay in sea water?’ Marina asked really confused. (What’s wrong with the water?) 

‘Yeah, I mean, it’s kind of cold but not anything too bad’. Albert said casually. 

‘We, Inklings nor Octolings can stay in sea water, for some reason we dissolve in it’. Cuttlefish explained. (What?) 

‘So, you’re telling me, that you evolved from sea creatures that could reign over the seas to humanoid squid and octopi, just after the sea levels arose dramatically?’ Albert questioned as he got on the ship again. 

‘Pretty much, yeah’. Orange said. (Now I understand what Tartar meant). 

‘That’s a pretty stupid way of evolving, but I guess that happened for something. You don’t know why that happens?’ Albert couldn’t help to guess it had something to be with physiologic fluids or something like that, like osmotic pressure. (Not sure if I'm right, but seems accurate). 

‘We have a theory that is because of the ink inside our bodies, since a lot of our bodies can become ink, hence this transformation’. Said Octavia as she transformed into a small and cute looking red octopus. (That’s adorable!) 

‘I’m guessing that Inklings are the same’. Albert asked to which the others nodded and transformed in response. (That’s weird). 

‘I’d like to think that while you are in that form you are completely made out of ink, so you can actually pass through objects of mold with your ink’. Again, he was answered with nods and a short demonstration. (Awesome, what a curios physiology). 

‘I will ask you for some samples so I can investigate a little more about your physiology, but for now, let’s go and eat something! I’m kinda starving a little, to be honest’. Albert said. 

‘That’s the spirit! Let’s go’. Said Octavia grappling my arm and starting to pull Albert. (Keep doing that and I might think you’re looking for some dicking). 

‘Just wait a second, I'll contact with the agents 1, 2 and 4, so you can meet them while we eat’. Commented Cuttlefish. 

‘Sound good to me’. Marina agreed. 

‘Onwards people’. Albert said as he climbed the helicopter, everyone folled shortly.


	4. Meeting the squidsisters... and agent 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I may have forgotten to describe Albert's clothing, which is just a simple white lab coat with a white shirt and red tie, black dress pants with black shoes; and casual he'll have a black sweater with black pants and black sneakers.

(Shit, I’m having a pretty bad time trying not to throw up, never been good with flying crap). Albert internally complained, until he saw Octavia move her lips, whose words were apparently directed towards him. 

‘Sorry, what was that again?’ Albert said while trying to hold his stomach in place. 

‘I was saying that if you’ve ever heard of the squid sisters’ Octavia asked and puffed. (Squid-what? How the fuck I am supposed to know if I woke up around 2 weeks ago?) 

‘Never, why? Are they famous or something like that?’ Albert was simply confused. 

‘They are the most famous squids in the whole Inkopolis, and they sing super good and they are awesome and talented and kind and...’ Octavia started to drift off. 

‘Yeah, sure... I get the idea’. (Not a fucking clue). 

‘Albert? Are you alright?’ Orange asked seeing how Albert was pale and trying to keep his insides inside. 

‘Just some motion sickness, everyone has their downfalls, right?’ Albert seemed like about to throw, until he shallowed. (Next time, I’ll go swimming). 

 

\---Some time later---

 

(I managed to hold up to my insides for this time, but I’ll surely die the next time around). 

They landed close to the shore, and got a panoramic view of whole Inkopolis. 

‘Here we are, Inkopolis’. Said Cuttlefish enthusiastically. (It is impressive, such a short amount of time and limited resources and still managed to get this city done). 

‘It’s awesome how you manage to get human architecture right, you’re smarter than you look’. Albert said with a smug smile. (We are close to the ocean, might as well just check this out). 

‘Never mind that, you said that you couldn’t touch water or only sea water?’ Albert ask as he got close to the shore. 

‘We can touch and drink water, but only if it’s purified’. Octavia answered. (Sounds really familiar). 

‘I’ll assume you can’t drink salty water nor touch it, or expose your body to it for a long time at least’. Albert said while touching the water. 

‘That’s correct. Have you already discovered why this happen?’ Cuttlefish ask curious and defiant, like trying to prove if Albert really could have found it so easily. (Not sure, but seems like a physiologic problem, maybe they are semipermeable and thus osmosis kills them, I just need a last question and my lab). 

‘I may be able to explain it, I just need you to tell me, do you dissolve or do you implode? Implode is the opposite of an explosion’. Albert looked at them for some seconds. 

‘We seem to implode, it feels like our skin and organs are sucked in until we break’. Orange was the one to answer this time. (She surely experienced that firsthand, I feel kinda sorry for her). 

‘Then the most logic option would be that osmosis is killing you’. Albert seemed really eager to throw someone to the ocean to see for himself that process. (Meaning that they could never swim in ocean water). 

‘Osmosis? What is that?’ Marina looked towards Albert confused due the use of a new word. (I’m not surprised). 

‘How about I tell you while we move towards that place where we are going to eat?’ Albert was hungry and his stomach had just agreed with him. 

‘Sure, let’s get going!’ Pearl pumped her fist up while doing a little jump. (Pfff what the fuck was that, so fucking cute). 

While they started moving through the shore since they didn’t want to reveal the existence of humans to the inkling and octarian population. 

‘Osmosis is a process that happens without the need of any energy, the only thing you need for it to happen is a semipermeable membrane, which I have already contemplated that you had one, since you can actually expulse ink with pressure I suppose. What happen in this kind systems, is that through osmosis the liquid with less concentration will spontaneously migrate through the membrane towards the liquid with more concentration, this happens to equilibrate and dissolve the excess of whatever type of matter that is there. So, when there is more salt, for example, in the water that you are swimming that in your body, all your water will abandon your body to dissolve the salt in the seawater, that’s the cause of the collapse and implosion of your body upon contact with seawater’. Albert said they entered to an old looking shack. 

‘That’s a lot to take, but I’ll assume you are different, since you can actually swim on seawater’. Cuttlefish was impressed with this new knowledge. 

‘Yes, but no so much. Our skin is different from yours; do you notice that my skin is tougher than yours? More rugged too’. To which everyone nodded. ‘Well, our skin is like that because we have a layer of dead cells with proteins that help is to avoid the entrance of substances that are unknown, some of it enters though diffusion, but our body is less sensitive to that, only some of our cells that are inside have those processes. Also, the fact that you are made of an organic compound that can be dissolved in water does not help, I'll have to confirm that by checking your skin tissue, and probably the composition of your ink, just to be sure’. Albert looked around and saw 2 suspicious looking female figures which actually surprised him. ‘And who are you supposed to be?’ Albert said in a semi hostile tone. (I just hope they didn’t discover me so fast). 

‘Calm down Albert, these 2 are my nieces, agent 1 and 2, also known as the squidsisters’. Cuttlefish said quite proud of his nieces. (I wish I also had a loving family... meh, who cares right now?) 

‘Oh, sorry... It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, I've heard nothing but good things about you 2. My name is Albert, and I am the last human alive’. Albert got close to them and shook their hands. 

Both inklings took out their masks and hats, an inkling with black tentacles and other one with white. (They are pretty and they have a nice body, god bless this new Eden). 

‘It’s a pleasure to meet you, human. My name is Callie and this is my cousin Marie. Don’t worry, gramps has already told us about you’. The inkling with black tentacles said, and pointed the one with the white tentacles, to which she only waved lazily. (And they are nice). 

‘He did? That’s grand. So, what are we eating?’ Albert hungrily asked. 

‘Oh, right. We brought pizza so we can all eat’. Callie said. 

‘It’s been months since I ate a pizza’. Albert said while he followed the cousins. 

‘That’s an awfully lot of time’. This time is was Marie who talked. (Finally, I can hear her voice). 

‘I’ve been living of expired food and dehydrated noodles this last 2 weeks, and before the fall of human race I hadn’t ate pizza or anything other than those things’. Albert said as everyone else sit around a circular table and he followed, everyone but Octavia who was way too excited and circling around the back of the shack. 

‘Octavia, care to take a seat honey?’ Albert said jokingly and everyone laughed a bit, with that Octavia blushed a little but actually took a seat. (That’s and improvement). 

‘Sorry, I’m just nervous. You are my favorite singers in the entire world and just don’t know what to say’. Octavia was really nervous. (She’s getting really flustered, it’s kinda cute but still, I should help her). 

Just when Albert was about to say something the door opened and a new inkling entered the shack, she had blue tentacles and blue eyes, some blue clothing. She inspected a little before she entered and closed the door. 

‘4, we’ve been waiting for you, come and have a seat’. Marie said as she moved her hand in a motion that signaled to get close. (I’m guessing her name es ‘Blue’). 

‘Sorry, I got caught with some stuff and it got late, but here I am’. She looked at Albert a little bit before talking again. ‘So, you are the last human alive? You are handsome, guess we got lucky to get you’. That cause Albert to stifle a little laught (Straight forward arent’cha?). 

‘Haha, it’s a pleasure to meet you 4, I’m guessing your name is Blue’. Albert purged his face from emotions as he looked into her eyes. 

‘How do you know? Did Marie or Callie tell you?’ The inkling said with faked surprise in her face. 

‘Just a hunch’. Albert raised his shoulders in a ‘don’t know’ motion. (Guess a was right). 

‘Well, now that we’re all here together, how about we start eating?’ Blue proposed and no one called against. 

And so they started eating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, I had to get my scholarship and partials were around the corner, also my computer spontaneously decided to die.

**Author's Note:**

> Good, now an image of Albert.  
> Imagine his as a young 20 years old guy, slim and short, around 5'5'' ft in (1.65m). Short wavy brownish hair, hazel eyes. Pessimistic nature.  
> Did you get the idea? Well then, you now know how I look, pretty common, right? That's the plan.


End file.
